If you’re taking any wedding planning tips from Hollywood, you’ve probably seen some of the stereotypical wedding speech horror stories. We have all equally cringed at disastrous scenes in The Wedding Singer, Wedding Crashers, The Wedding Planner, and many others. From drunken uncles to aspiring comedians, you probably want to avoid some of the typical pitfalls. The best way to avoid these common fears of wedding speeches is to know what you want ahead of time and then prepare.
The most important thing to remember when assigning wedding speeches is that they will be representing you in many ways. Pick someone you trust, make sure that the person feels extremely comfortable speaking in front of a crowd. For instance, your best friend may be a real hoot, but if she is fearful of public speaking it will not only be uncomfortable for her, but for everyone forced to watch her squirm, too. Also, make sure anyone chosen to be a part of your wedding party clearly understands the atmosphere you desire the day of your wedding. The sound of chirping crickets aren’t the only thing you’ll be thinking about when you’re chosen speaker turns what you had hoped to be an elegant wedding speech into an episode of hee-haw!
Wedding Speech Tradition
It seems that much of tradition in our current wedding culture has gone the way of the chastity belt. And yet, there are still some of us that seek the romance of tradition. Especially when it comes to our weddings!
In the past, it was generally only the father of the Bride and the father of the Groom who would provide blessings to the new couple. The traditional list of wedding speeches has changed over time to include:
- The Father of the Bride – it is an unwritten rule that the father of the bride gives the first wedding speech. His role is to welcome the guests, talk about the couple, and give a toast to the union.
- The Groom – after the father of the bride welcomes all guests, the groom will then give a toast to his new wife and her family.
- The Best Man – the best man’s job is to toast the groom and begin the celebration of the reception.
Wedding Speeches Today
Today, a wedding speech can be given by anyone, from your father to a close personal friend. Many couples invite their entire wedding party and guests to say a few things during the reception. There seems to be no current model for giving speeches at today’s weddings. This in itself has led many obligated to such a task to feel confused about what to say and how to say it. The doors are wide open for humor and reminiscing, so make sure you let them know what you’re okay with.
Setting the Stage for Wedding Speeches
The list of speakers at your wedding can be as long or short as you choose. As formal or informal as you are comfortable. The most important thing to remember is to be organized. A good way to accomplish this is to assign a toastmaster. A toastmaster will be responsible for introducing all wedding speakers at the time you have allotted, which will cut down on confusion and keep speakers comfortable and knowing what to expect.
Once wedding speeches are complete, a toastmaster will then open the floor to guests to say a few words (if this is what you wish.) The toastmaster will be responsible for making sure this flows properly, as well.
As is true from the time we are born, our family and friends are a piece of us. They represent who we are, all of the similarities and the differences. Make sure you don’t put too much pressure on those you have chosen to give a wedding speech. The likelihood that they will be experiencing some sort of fear, with public speaking topping the phobia list, is pretty good. Give them the freedom to speak from their heart and you will not go wrong.