Wedding Blog

One of the most facinating parts of my trip was visiting with a Shaman named Raven. She performs spiritual weddings for guests of Waterfall Villas and other locations in Costa Rica.

Raven traveled and studied at more than 200 sacred sites around the world. She brings that vast knowledge of customs and ancient traditions into her ceremony.

One beautiful feature of her ceremony is that she builds sacred altars. She like to create a space, fill it with love and celebrate something special, like a marriage in that space.

One of the current ceremonies she uses comes from European/Celtic tradtions. She includes handfasting with spoken promises between the bride and groom. Each colored ribbon symbolizes on of those promises.

The “Blessing Boat” was my favorite part of the ceremony. The couple works together to build a boat out of flowers and leaves and then sends it down the waterfall. The “boat” goes in many directions based on the rocks and the current but it eventually reaches the bottom. This symbolizes releasing the marriage to be whatever it is to be. Life doesn’t always go exactly as we plan it. A good marriage needs to adapt to the many ways we travel through life and througout the couple remains together.

Raven has also done Native American wedding ceremonies and she is currently working on a Christian ceremony.

If you have questions on this or any other wedding related topic, please post for me here or send me an email to susan.southerland@pwg.com. Also become a fan on Facebook by clicking here and follow me on Twitter by clicking here.

Your partner in perfect planning,

Susan

Weddings are a time of happy celebration, but often, someone important is missing from the festivities. Many couples ask me how to memorialize a friend or family member on the wedding day. This can be a challenge. We want to create a memorial that is meaningful, but we don’t want to sabotage the celebration. Here are some ideas for creating a special memorial for a loved one.

1. If the one to be memorialized is a close family member like a parent or grandparent, leave an empty seat in the front row during the ceremony. We have also placed a single flower on that chair to indicate that it is empty because someone special is missing.
2. Put a notice in the ceremony program. On a few occasions the bride or groom have written a small paragraph or poem about the loved one they are memorializing.
3. Do a photo display at the reception including photos of the couple with the person to be memorialized. Frame a small paragraph about the person and place it on the display as well.
4. Make a donation to a charity in the person’s name and put a small note on your menu card or in a small frame on your guest tables.

I remember early in my career I had a wedding where the bride’s father had passed away. Several family members made big speeches about the father, with very honorable intentions, but the bride was a sobbing mess when the speeches were over. It is important to acknowledge loved ones who have passed, but keep the memorial small so that it doesn’t overshadow the celebration.

If you have questions on this or any other wedding related topic, please post for me here or send me an email to susan.southerland@pwg.com. Also become a fan on Facebook by clicking here and follow me on Twitter by clicking here.

Your partner in perfect planning,

Susan

Comments

I had a bride pose an interesting question to me the other day. She loves the look of a Chuppah, but she isn’t Jewish. She wanted to know whether or not she could have one at her wedding.

Let’s start with the definition of a Chuppah. A Chuppah is a canopy under which a Jewish bride and groom get married. The Chuppah represents the home that the couple will build together. It is created by using four poles with fabric or a tallis (a religious prayer shawl) stretched across the top. Some of them are very ornate with flowers, others are just the tallis and four poles. The literal translation of Chuppah is canopy, so yes, regardless of whether or not you are Jewish, you may have a canopy at your wedding!

Here are some of my favorite Chuppahs:

Courtesy of Petals by Design in Orlando

Courtesy of Petals by Design

Courtesy of DamonTucci.com (photo) and Raining Roses (design)

Courtesy of Unruephoto.com (photo) and dalsimerflorist.com (design)

If you have questions on this or any other wedding related topic, please post for me here or send me an email to susan.southerland@pwg.com. Also become a fan on Facebook by clicking here and follow me on Twitter by clicking here.

Your partner in perfect planning,

Susan

Rehearsals can be really chaotic. It is typically the first time family and friends are seeing each other, so everyone is anxious to catch up and to start having fun. It seems the last thing anyone wants to do is take instructions on where to stand and how to walk. I have seen some very unruly bridesmaids and groomsmen in my time. If your wedding party is a bit rambunctious, send them these five simple rules on behaving well at your rehearsal.

1. Don’t show up intoxicated. I don’t think this requires explanation. Save the drinking for the rehearsal dinner.
2. Show up on time. Keep in mind that the bride and groom are probably nervous. Don’t make your timely arrival become one of the things they have to worry about. Also, many ceremony locations have time restrictions for the rehearsal. Showing up late might mean no rehearsal at all.
3. Pay attention and limit talking. The rehearsal will get done much faster if the person in charge doesn’t have to keep redirecting your attention. The faster the rehearsal is finished, the sooner you will be able to enjoy the post-rehearsal celebration.
4. If you are a reader, bring your reading with you to practice.
5. Be helpful. If the couple has items to transport to the ceremony site, offer to assist with carrying and storing. If guests need directions to the rehearsal dinner, hand out direction cards. There are countless opportunities for you to alleviate stress from the bride and groom the day before the wedding.

If you have any questions or comments on this topic or any other wedding related topic, please leave me a message here or email me at susan.southerland@pwg.com.

Your partner in perfect planning,

Susan

Happy Monday everyone. It’s another gloomy day here in Orlando. I am getting tired of the rain.

Wedding season is in full swing and I have been doing many, many rehearsals. This past weekend inspired me to do a week-long series on all things “rehearsal.” Here is the schedule for the week…

Monday — What you need to prepare for the rehearsal
Tuesday — Rehearsal etiquette for wedding party
Wednesday — How to run through the ceremony
Thursday — Rehearsal dinner ideas
Friday — Toasts and gift giving at rehearsal dinner

Here is my list of items you need for a smooth rehearsal:

1. Your marriage license. Your officiant will most likely want to take it from you at the rehearsal so you won’t have to worry about it on the wedding day.
2. If you haven’t paid your site fees in advance, be sure to bring what you owe so you can be paid in full prior to the wedding.
3. A list of the bridesmaids and groomsmen and their order at the altar. This will make it easier for the person conducting the rehearsal to organize everyone.
4. A list of the grandparents, mothers, bridesmaids and groomsmen in the order they will process down the aisle. If the grandparents and mothers are being ushered, make sure to include the ushers’ names next to the people they are ushering.
5. A list of song selections for the wedding party noting when the music is to change.
6. A copy of the ceremony readings. Readers are notorious for not having them at the rehearsal. The readers should take a moment to get comfortable with the mic and where they are standing. The audio person might want to do a sound check as well.
7. If your ceremony site has a secure place to store things, bring everything you need for the ceremony like guest book, pen, ring barer pillow, flower girl basket and unity candle, so you don’t have to think about it on the wedding day.
8. Written directions to the rehearsal dinner. You don’t want to waste time giving instructions to everyone, be prepared to hand them the information.

As always, relax and enjoy the rehearsal. Keep in mind, your wedding party is likely to be a bit more casual at the rehearsal than during the wedding ceremony. If they don’t stand in a perfect line or if they have their hands in their pockets, don’t sweat it. They will likely come to attention on the wedding day.

If you have any questions or if you would like to post some thoughts regarding any wedding subject, please leave me a message here, or send me an email to susan.southerland@pwg.com.

Your partner in perfect planning,

Susan