Wedding Planning Blog

Destination Weddings seems to be a topic on everyone’s minds. We at Just Marry! have seen a big increase in destination weddings here in Orlando and outbound as well.

A college student writing an article for Boston University just contacted me to ask me questions about the pros and cons of planning a destination wedding. As soon as the article comes out, I will link to it. Anyway, one of her questions was, is a destination wedding less or more expensive than a traditional wedding.

That is an interesting question!

My associate Aimee Bressler handles most of our inbound Orlando destination weddings. Her brides typically have fifty guests or fewer. Many of her clients say that they decided to do a destination wedding specifically so they don’t have to invite 250 guests to attend. Some of them do it for budgetary reasons, others do it because they don’t want to be “on stage” on their wedding day.

Aimee’s clients typically spend between $3000.00 and $12,000.00 on their entire wedding. That certainly seems like a big savings over an in-town traditional wedding.

Michele Butler and I typically handle the outbound destination weddings and the large in-bound destination weddings. Our clients for outbound weddings typically have ten to 100 guests and spend starting at $40,000.00. That’s a lot of money for ten people! The reason these couples do it, usually has something to do with sentimentality. They want to be married in a place that is very special to them and they want to share that place with their guests.

Our inbound destination weddings spend anywhere from $40,000.00 to $150,000.00 or more. These weddings typically have 150 guests or more. These couples usually say they marry here because the guests live all over the country, or all over the world, and they wanted to have their wedding in a location that was easy to travel to and had lots of things for their guests to do.

So, can you save money planning a destination wedding? Absolutely, but you have to plan carefully!

It isn’t often that I toot my own horn, but I was so honored and excited to see this write-up by Jean Patteson, Fashion Editor at the Orlando Sentinel. I hope you will indulge me by allowing me to share these kudos with you.

Question: My stepdaughter will be married in September and has asked me to work with her on planning the wedding. I feel honored, of course, but also terrified. I have no idea where to begin — and she doesn’t either. Can you help?

Answer: There are loads of wedding how-to books, but reading is a solitary business. A wedding-planning DVD, on the other hand, is something you and your step-daughter can watch together, pausing whenever you want to discuss a point or make notes. And if there are tips and ideas you’d like to share with the groom and/or father-of-the-bride, all you need do is hit “rewind” and “play.”

Believe me, it is easier to get most men to watch a DVD than read a bridal magazine.

One of the best DVDs I’ve viewed is JustMarry!: Wedding Planning Secrets by Orlando wedding planner Susan Southerland. She covers everything from selecting a gown, invitations and venue, to working with vendors — photographers, musicians, bakers, caterers and more. Packed with no-nonsense tips for saving time, money and stress, the DVD is aimed at both do-it-yourself brides and those working with professional planners.

Southerland, a 20-year veteran of the wedding-planning and travel industries, and a member of the Association of Bridal Consultants, is founder and president of Just Marry! She has helped plan more than 5,000 weddings and appeared on the Style Network’s Whose Wedding Is It Anyway? and The Learning Channel’s Wedding Story.

The 68-minute DVD costs $29.95, and can be ordered at justmarry.com.

Jean Patteson

Today I took over a client from one of the other planners in my company. This unfortunately happens from time-to-time when there is turnover.

Turnover is a frequent occurrence in the event industry; people get promoted or change companies. Unfortunately, this particular bride has had to deal with being passed from one person to another a few times during her planning process. My staff went through two changes and her catering manager also changed jobs and she was given to another manager there.

When I spoke with her mom today, she wasn’t very happy. She was worried that everything she and her daughter had planned was being diluted by being passed among so many people. I assured her that I had everyone’s notes and that all would be just fine. She was further comforted by the fact that as the owner of the company, I wasn’t going anywhere!

Change most certainly happens during the wedding planning process. How are you to survive and not go insane (or worse, turn into Bridezilla)? Here are some tips:

1. Keep good notes. This is why I LOVE email. My planners keep all the correspondence they have between the vendors and the bride so that if something were to happen, someone else could easily step in and take over.

2. Keep in constant contact with your vendors. If something changes at the company, you will be among the first to know. This doesn’t mean call every week, but send an email every once and a while letting them know how your planning is coming along. Your pleasant email will keep you at the top of your vendors’ minds.

3. Express your frustration (if you have any) with the change, then let it go. This presumes that the company with whom you are working has hired a competent replacement for the person who left. If you aren’t happy with the replacement, talk with her first. Let her know your concerns. If your concerns are still not addressed, calmly speak to her superior. Make sure you can specifically address how your needs aren’t being met.

4. Set up a face-to-face meeting with the replacement. This is an excellent time to get to know her and to make sure she has all the details that her predecessor had.

Change is really difficult, especially with something as detailed and emotional as planning a wedding. I know that my clients get very attached to me. (The reverse is true as well.) Just understand that people move on in every business. If your vendors are professional, they will help you through the change.

I love my job! Each and every day I am grateful for my clients and my associates. My career has taken me around the country and around the world. I have met hundreds, maybe thousands of wedding professionals — some very famous that you would recognize and others who just humbly run their small business every day. From photographers and videographers to catering managers and other wedding planners, they are wonderful people who dedicate their careers to create a beautiful, memorable day for couples and their families.

I remember one incident very fondly that happened several years ago. I was at an Association of Bridal Consultants convention in San Diego. Colin Cowie was our keynote speaker. He was open and warm and shared many of his tips and secrets to his success. Some of those tips I put into my day to day business routine, others were so meaningful to me that they wove themselves into my business philosophy. He also spent quite a bit of time chatting with us “up and comers,” never rolling an eye or acting impatient. He mentioned again and again how important his team was. That no wedding day succeeded on the shoulders of one vendor. I was amazed that someone with such a high profile had such a team philosophy. I have never forgotten that.

I found that philosophy to be prevalent among the other famous wedding planners whom I have met; Preston Bailey, Mindy Weiss, David Tutera, Sasha Souza, Marci Bloom — none of whom acted as self-anointed Gods of the wedding industry. All gave credit to their team and their vendors.

It is that type of mentality that you should look for when seeking a wedding vendor. Those planners, photographers, videographers, etc. who are truly great, know they can’t do it alone. We can only succeed as one group working to make your wedding day amazing.

So my advice for today, if you are shopping for a vendor and you hear a great deal of “me, me, me,” run for the door. There are many brilliant, talented wedding professionals who have carved out an entire career focused on “you, you, you.” Seek them out. You will be delighted with the result.

YES, YES, YES!

I have to tell you. I am planning destination weddings for two clients, one in Italy and one in the Bahamas. It is a very different experience from planning one locally. It is much more time consuming. I plan weddings all day long. I can’t imagine fitting in all the details if I were working a full time job AND planning my wedding.

Here is what we need to do to get the marriage license in Italy:

Get copies of birth certificates with an Apostille.
Have the documents translated into Italian.
Go to an Italian Embassy and swear in person that you are eligible for marriage.
Go to the region where the wedding takes place to get an Atto Notorio.

Then, weddings in Italy can only take place in the town hall. So we have to have the official wedding in the morning in the town hall and a symbolic wedding at their desired location in the afternoon.

The most interesting part of this wedding is that we had to get permission from the mayor of the town to get married in July since they typically do not do weddings in July or August. Pheww!

I always learn something new!

In the end, my bride and groom are going to get the wedding they always dreamed about… but it is a lot of work. If you have dreams of getting married in Europe, or some exotic locale, make sure you know what you are getting into… Most importantly, hire a good, patient and determined wedding planner!

Yesterday my team and I participated in the most wonderful wedding show at the Ritz-Carlton, Orlando Grand Lakes. The concept was to have the best wedding planners in the city including Susie Weiss from Wonderful Weddings, Lisa Konecny from E-Events , my good friend and colleague, Michele Butler, and me with the rest of the Just Marry! team, work with our favorite designers to come up with signature looks to present to brides.

Lee Forrest was our wonderful designer. He did an incredible job.

The results were amazing. I am including some photos below. My camera does not do the work justice. I will post the ones from the professionals, including those from my wedding-planner friends, as soon as I get copies.

I hope you enjoy the photos!

I am best friends with my “competition.” Its a funny (but wonderful) thing. We go out to dinner, go to the movies, go for drinks, email and chat on the phone. We are each others’ best supporters. So, it is really hard when a bride shops all of us.

We are all qualified, talented planners, but sometimes, we have a difficult time distinguishing among us as to who is the best. Actually, I don’t think there is one answer to that question. So aside from the normal list that you see on how to choose a planner like, How long has she been in business? How many weddings has she done? Is she a member of any professional organizations? What does she charge?, I have come up with a two additional questions to consider.

1. Does the planner match your style in both look and personality? My friends and I are all a great group of girls, but each of us has a distinct style. Whimsical, serious, older, younger, vivacious, and reserved are just a few adjectives that have been used to describe us. Make sure the planner you choose is a good fit for you.
    
2. How does the planner work on the wedding day? Some planners are hands-off and others are right in the thick of things. Some brides hire a planner for the prestige of having a planner so they like someone who will mingle with guests and stand out, others hire a planner to be — a planner and feel more comfortable if she stands in the background and makes sure everything runs smoothly.

I hope that you have as many wonderful options for wedding planners as we do here in Orlando. It will make shopping around a lot more fun, but the decision making may be a bit more difficult. As I always say, go with your gut, you get what you pay for and once you make a decision stick with it and enjoy the planning process.

Hi All,

I am very, very excited. After working for a year, my new wedding planning DVD is finally here and available to you! Susan Southerland’s Wedding Planning Secrets has my most sought-after advice in one DVD.

I share my secrets for choosing colors, creating a reasonable budget, dealing with vendors and organizing the day. Check out the website for more information.

I will be at the Perfect Wedding Guide wedding show on Sunday at the Buena Vista Palace. If you are in Orlando, come see me. I am looking forward to discussing your wedding plans with you and on my table, is my Ten Inspirational Ideas for an Out of the Ordinary Wedding idea list, to assist you in planning a memorable wedding!

I hope to see you there!

I spoke and attended the Association of Bridal Consultants convention in November. I love attending seminars because they give me wonderful, creative ideas. Even better, it helps me recharge and get excited about my job.

This year, one of the luncheons was dedicated to finding balance as a wedding planner. Mary Dann, a wedding planner out of California, gave a wonderful presentation on the importance of positive thinking and also on living and enjoying life while maintaining a career.

The presentation made me think about many of my clients. They are not only planning a wedding, they are building houses, changing careers and negotiating the politics of joining two families together. Anyone of these activities would be stressful, but couples are actually combining these life-changing events.

Most of us are good multi-taskers and can handle the stress of the aforementioned tasks, but it is important that we take time to relax — enjoy the planning process and the engagement. Brides and grooms should never forget to take care of their relationships while taking care of seating arrangements. Find good, quality time to spend with one another and put the planning book away — at least for a couple of hours!